What Do You Want?

Happy Beautiful Thursday everyone!

I am currently sitting outside in the back yard. This is an uncommon joy for me since I usually teach during the daytime. Lucky for me my junior high-ers are busy testing today, so I have a few hours to myself. Double points for today because it is a gorgeous 61 degrees out. 

This bit of time is a nice relief. This semester has been a busy one for me. I've acquired new students (RHS! Woo!), had a couple of musical gigs (South Pacific at Lake Highlands and a two-week Les Miserables run), accompanied several students for Solo and Ensemble, and recorded as much as I could for music festival auditions. Oh! Can't forget joining Legacy Brass! During the last month I was leaving to teach from 8-2ish (sometimes to 4pm) and then heading out for Les Mis or other rehearsals. I didn't walk through my door again until 10pm on some nights. 

I won't lie: this life style is wearing. I love teaching, and I love playing. But 14 hours days can be a lot, especially when you have many in a row. That's why these past 10 days or so have been a nice breather for me. There's one topic of discussion in my lessons right now, since All Region/Solo and Ensemble are done: I ask my kids, "What do you want for next year?"

This started as a practical question on my part. I needed to know what the kids expected, desired, and aspired for their next year in band. I see it as part of my job to help them get to where they want to go - wherever that may be. I needed to know so that I would have a good idea of how to proceed forward in my teaching (I'm still a newbie at this). 

After two days of asking kids this question, I noticed I mostly got two types of answers.

The first answer was purposeful, unquestionably confident, and full of delight. I think some of my kids were actually delighted to be asked what they wanted, as if they already had ambitions and goals to meet for their next year in band. They were ready to share what had been decided within. With excitement, the student and I would plan out objectives for the 2013-2014 school year. (I'm excited because this feeds my band-nerd-iness.)

The second kind of answer was a shrug. 

What! A shrug? I can't plan my curriculum and methods on a shrug. I pressed on further.

"What do you want? We can do anything. Do you want to go up a band? Make All Region? Get a 1 at Solo and Ensemble?"

More shrugs. Maybe an "I dunno. I guess. Yeah."

Nothing! There was nothing in these answers. No spark, and certainly no ambition. No personality. And maybe the saddest one of all: no desire. Nothing. My questions dropped with a thud. Like a miss-sacked hackey sack.  

I found myself trying to assure them that they could have whatever they wanted. Obviously it means they'd have to work for it. My point, though, was that they had someone on their side that was committed to helping them get where they wanted to go - a pretty valuable someone at that. (I posses the secrets to horn playing... muahahahaaaaaa.)

This is a little discouraging, but not totally - if a kid doesn't want to do anything we'll just play scales and rhythms all day long. However it did get me thinking about myself and my life.

But there must be a reason why the kids shrugged when I asked them what they want. It can be a tough question to answer! Here's why:

1. They don't know what they want. 
2. They are afraid to admit what they want. 
3. They don't believe they can have what they want.
4. There is no point. To any of this. (i.e. - they do not care)

There's probably more, but I'll leave it with these four.

I wondered if I've asked myself the same question recently. "What do I want?" I realized last week that this is a question not just for horn students grades 7-12. Everybody on the planet needs to ask or be asked this question. The question needs to be asked because there not many other ways to get what you want unless you know what it is you want. I thought on this some more. If I need to ask the same question I'm asking my kids, then which of the two responses will I have? It is a choice, and I can choose how to respond to such a question. (for the record, I choose the first kind of answer)

It comes down to this: we all have desires. It doesn't matter the size or ambition of the desire, but we all want stuff. I believe the best thing is to express -  to oneself and to others - what one wants. Stuff doesn't get done when it sits quietly and untouched inside of people. It has to get out, so get it out! Tell people. Tell yourself! Write it down and stick it on your wall. Then you get to be told of your desires every time you look at it!

1. Don't know what you want? Then spend some time thinking about it. Spend some time with your family and friends. You'll see them doing what they want, and it may inspire you to find what you want. 
2. Are you afraid to admit what you want? Grab a confidant. Grab your closest friend or a bosom body. You may need someone you can open up to in order to get those juices flowing. You may need another person to walk you through what you want. 
3. You need to believe you can have what you want. Despair and self-pity is a mucky bog. I've spent a lot of time trying to convince some friends of mine that they could have spectacular lives, but I don't think they ever listened. Some people find it easier to sink low than to soar high. I don't think very much happiness is found in those low places. 
4. There's no point? Wrong! There is a point! As long as you are alive, there will always be a point. Try really hard to not end up as a 77 year old person that looks back and sees a life with no point. 

I wrote this earlier, but this is true for all: I said to the unsure kids "What do you want? We can do anything." Whether or not you're able to see it, there are folks all around you very willing to help you get where you want to go. That is a great resource for your life. 

Accept help when it comes your way, and look for help when it seems you have none. 

You can always have help. You can have what you want.

If you do all this, then stuff will start to happen in your life. Then stuff will get done. 

To put my money where my mouth is, I'll leave you with a few of pictures of what I want. :)

Currently trying to figure out if I 'want' short hair.

Big want: a husband and kids.
If we end up on a farm and the dude
is like a young Paul McCartney...
well then ok. :)

Legacy Brass

Good evening friends! I have some exciting news...

I have been invited to join the ranks of Dallas/Ft Worth's Legacy Brass Quintet! I sat in on a rehearsal recently and thoroughly enjoyed the experience. I was delighted to hear this weekend that they enjoyed having me with them! 

I am very honored to be a part of this quintet as they are all excellent players with amazing experience behind each of them. I LOVE brass ensembles and I'm really quite stoked to get to work with one professionally. These guys in particular have a great business plan and vision for what they want to accomplish as a group. That is the sort of thing I definitely love to be a part of.

You can check out their website here: http://legacybrassquintet.com/

Hopefully this new step in my musical profession will encourage me to get back on the saddle and start keeping this site better. I have a lot of ideas in my head, and I need to get them fleshed out for you all - especially my students. Too bad life is wonderfully busy and keeps me occupied (more than I want to be sometimes).

So Long 2012!

Merry (post) Christmas everyone!

The New Year is just days away. I've been having a very lovely break with my family. Hope it's been lovely for all of you!

New year turnovers are always the time for resolutions and new inspirations and motivations. Look what I've been eyeing this afternoon!

Mmm, yes. Beautiful new mouthpieces. These are Paxman mouthpieces. I used to play on a 2B that I bought off a fellow horn player (for £20, woop!) when I lived in Liverpool. Unfortunately it was lost almost year ago; I have a feeling I absentmindedly left it in one of the schools I taught in. 

That 2B was a great little mouthpiece, and there was something comforting about having an all-Paxman getup. Therefore today I took the plunge and found online a 2B mouthpiece and no. 2, 3, 4 rims to experiment on. 

Currently I use a Moosewood B mouthpiece (C backbore) with an M5 rim. A bit straight down the road in terms of size. It's not that this one isn't working out for me, but I'd like to spend a little time on a Paxman mouthpiece again. You'll run into horn players that are always looking for "The One" - the holy grail of metal that we stick on our faces. I don't know if such a thing exists. I'm more interested in finding my "Old Reliable." I played on a Lawson mouthpiece for 10 years. I'd like to find one I will be happy to use for the next 10 years. 

I'll keep you all posted. Mouthpiece work is fascinating, and it certainly makes a difference in the sound you get out of your horn - and all brass instruments for that matter!

One final thing.....

New Year's Resolution(s)? I know one right off the top of my head: I need to start getting some videos up here. That'll be something I experiment with in 2013....

Twelve Things I Learned in my First Year.

I have entered my second year of being self employed, so I thought I would share some of the things I learned in my first year. Enjoy!

In my 'office'.

1. Try to keep from explaining yourself. This equals a shut mouth and very open ears. You learn a lot that way. People say you'll be considered wiser than you actually are. 

2. A lot of would-be problems or potential sticky situations get solved by letting time pass. Be patient. Let things unfold.

3. You can almost turn anything into a money-maker if you pitch it right. I know 'money' is sort of a bad word these days, but it sure is necessary for people who are self-employed or own their own businesses. How else will you make rent?

4. When all else fails, teach what you know. It's an efficient way to earn a living, and you provide a good service for people who need to learn!

5. On that note, I'll go one further: Identify the thing that came easy to you in your life. Do it, spread the knowledge of how to do it to others. It may be the one thing you master in your lifetime. You owe it to yourself and the world to offer up something you've mastered. It'll fulfill you. You will also be giving a gift to the world with your unique talent. For whatever reason, the thing that came easy for me was horn playing. 

6. Write emails. People don't know you exist until you make contact with them. That's how stuff happens - people need stuff done and you can do it for them. But you can't do it for them if they don't know you exist. 

7. Always show up to stuff. Don't presume you're not needed until you find out first hand in person. Be that faithful person that always comes through. DON'T be a flake. Flakiness is a good way to not succeed.

8. "Blood of diligence, wounds of disappointment". I have these words written on a white board in my living room. Success takes time to build up, and guess what? There's a lot of failures, mistakes, and unfortunate circumstances along the way. Tomorrow is a new day. Try again. One day one of your 'try agains' will eventually gain you traction and move you forward.

9. Don't use social networks how most people use them. Definitely put them to use for your business - it's a great way to make contacts and keep in touch with the people involved with your business. However, if you really need it, have a very private sphere for your personal accounts. Rewire how you look at and use facebook, twitter, instagram, etc. Potential clients are not people with whom you want to share info on your bad days. 

I have realized that since I work for myself my business is pretty much always 'open' or on display for people. I have to be very careful with what I project to the world. It isn't difficult; it just requires me to think twice about what I say and do. Facebook definitely falls under that umbrella.

10. Keep the people you want to be like in your sights, and you will naturally end up being like them. It is like the flower that positions itself towards the direction of the sun. It grows towards its nourishment. Also keep tracking those you don't want to be like. It's not good to focus on negative things, but it helps to remind yourself of how you don't want to end up. 

11. Organization. Organization. Organization. Your life and business are messes without it. I know this first hand. Those who know me personally know what a huge statement this is. I'm naturally a messy, unorganized person. But if I want to see money in my bank account, I need to be on top of my game. I need to be organized.

12. To some extent, you don't need anyone's permission to do what you want to do. I draw this thought from two specific artists I really like: Bill Callahan and St Vincent. Both in their careers have had to record at home with very limited resources and equipment. Their limitations never stopped them from doing what they really wanted to do - create music. 

When I was in college, there were many things I wanted to do (like becoming a really proficient musician and writing my own music). One day this past year, I was playing with a group of friends in my home. It was only a jam session, but it was a lot of fun and what we were playing wasn't even that bad. I remember saying, "I wish I knew I could have done this in college." My environment never looked like how I expected it to, and that stopped me from doing what I wanted to do. Life will never be perfect, and it's probably not going to be ideal for most of the time you're alive. Just get up, do, and don't apologize for it (unless maybe it's really bad). 

Catching friends Stacy and Darren at Mutemath's show. 

Necessary. Doesn't that look delicious?

Bought an old mellophone off of ebay recently.

Crooks for the mellophone.

Old Faithful. Used it for 10 years.

New Faithful. Using it since this summer.

The cat.

The dog.

The workspace.

I have some more posts coming up - All Region related! Stay tuned.